New song I've just written/recorded! 'A Game of Cards'. Please comment.

[Tommy]

here we go:

A Game of Cards (http://torolk.homestead.com/files/A_Game_Of_Cards.mp3)

I'm pretty new to the whole songwriting and recording malarky, this is the third proper song I've written. So, don't expect perfection, but I think it's pretty good. Let me know what you think, anyway :)

Tommy

[Haly]

I quite like it :)
Although I think maybe the guitar drowns your voice out a bit, I'd rather hear more of the vocals than the music, but that's probably just down to personal opinion :)

[Tommy]

Thanks. I think the general consensus after posting it around a few forums I frequent and asking friends on the net, the vocals are quite weak for not having much melody themselves, and it's not as catchy as it should be.

Also, the drums are pretty poor but I don't really have a solution for that at the moment.

I'm probably going to try next to make a short, catchy earworm of a song :evil: