Verbal Fubars

[Tak]

You know what I mean - when you substitute words in a sentence by accident and don't even realise it (until everyone starts laughing at you)

At the party on Saturday there was pass the parcel, and all of the "prizes" in it were donated by the guy who works in the local sex shop.
Myke (whos birthday it was) ended up getting this spikey scary looking glow in the dark condom.
When telling a different friend about the party on sunday I proclaimed he had got a sea enema rather than a sea anemone :o She found it so amusing she kept randomly bursting into giggles the rest of the day :o

[Pebs]

When I was about 14 I went into a sports shop and asked for a vibrator button for my tennis raquet. I meant vibration button. I was so naieve I didnt know why people laughed at me :D

[Desmo]

The best one I've heard was my mum walking up to the ice cream van and asking for a 69. The look on the guys face was priceless ;D

[BBx]

One of my friends went into a paint store and asked for Durex.

I think she did it on purpose ;)

BB x

[Roberta]

If I've done a few classes in a row and am tired I get body part names mixed up. My classes are now used to me asking them to do things like 'drop your foot down between your shoulders' and just laugh at me.

[mok`]

When I was about 14 I went into a sports shop and asked for a vibrator button for my tennis raquet. I meant vibration button. I was so naieve I didnt know why people laughed at me :D

I did the exact same thing when I was 12 in Home Economics. We were asked to give examples of electrical goods you would use in the kitchen. What I actually mean was "food processor" :confused:

Mind you I'm sure you could use a vibrator in the kitchen if you wanted to!

[Pheebs]

I sometimes (although not so bad as of late...) get words crossed over when I speak due to speaking fast and having a scatter brain... and sometimes manage to make up words that sound like the word I'm trying to say but isn't. Like I'll say "I'll open the dob!" and my brains mushed "door" and "knob" together.

One time, in our busy police office I decided to make some porridge and thought I would ask everyone if they wanted me to make extra for them and exclaimed across the room:

"Anyone want some Knobbage?"

Once again, I was looking at the door handle and speaking at the same time and I think I crossed "knob" with "porridge" again.

Damn knobs. The bain of my life.

[Wryel]

Damn nobs. The bain of my life.


Fixed.