Army Not-To-Do-List

[Pheebs]

Funny as list! Lots of rofflecopters from this household:

http://skippyslist.com/list/

Some of my personal favourites:

29. The Irish MPs are not after “Me frosted lucky charms”.

31. Not allowed to let sock puppets take responsibility for any of my actions.

32. Not allowed to let sock puppets take command of my post.

36. Can’t have flashbacks to wars I was not in. (The Spanish-American War isn’t over).

54. “Napalm sticks to kids” is *not* a motivational phrase.

77. The MP checkpoint is not an Imperial Stormtrooper roadblock, so I should not tell them “You don’t need to see my identification, these are not the droids you are looking for.”

79. I am neither the king nor queen of cheese. (*cough* Belmit *cough*)


115. I should not speculate on the penis size of anyone who outranks me.

128. “Shpadoinkle” is not a real word.

136. Shouting “Let’s do the village! Let’s do the whole ****ing village!” while out on a mission is bad.

150. On Sports Day PT, a wedgie is not considered a legal tackle.

186. I am not the Emperor of anything.

202. Despite the confusing similarity in the names, the “Safety Dance” and the “Safety Briefing” are never to be combined.

204. NEVER nail a stuffed bunny to a cross and put it up in front of the Battalion Headquarters sign as an “Easter Desecration.”

Serious laughage!

[Del Lardo]

Utterly brilliant

[Desmo]

That list is great


43. Camouflage body paint is not a uniform.

Sort of thing I'd do

[Pheebs]

Have to admit, there was a fair few on the list that made me lol and think "Ha! that's something Desmo would do!"

[Flibster]

Good old Skippy. There's loads of other lists from former and currently serving people on there too.

[SidewinderINC]

Love that list, my personal favourite being

35. Not allowed to sing “High Speed Dirt” by Megadeth during airborne operations.

[Creature]

I'm just laughing at Shpadoinkle. Utterly brilliant word.

[Glaucus]

Brilliant. Love the food dye ones, before a pee test.