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07-03-2009, 00:21
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#1 |
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Dubious
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Northampton
Posts: 1,571
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Blighter Jokes
As they are called on another forum...
__________________________________________________ _______________ I woke up this morning and forgot which side the sun rises from. Then it dawned on me. __________________________________________________ _______________ Statistically 6 out of 7 dwarves are not happy. __________________________________________________ _______________ Man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian replies, "F*** off, you won't bring it back!". __________________________________________________ _______________ Feel free to suggest some and I will update this post with them 
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Look at your signature, now back to mine, now back to yours, now back to mine.
Sadly, yours isn't mine. But if you stopped writing about other things and made this your signature, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. Where are you? You're on Boat Drinks, reading the signature your signature could be like. I'm on a computer. |
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07-03-2009, 00:25
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#2 |
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The Mouse King of Denmark
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: The Winchester
Posts: 6,476
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Are these a bit like the Tim Vine one-liners?
'I went to the library and a man there chopped off the bottom of one of my trouser legs and put it on a shelf. I said "That's a turn-up for the books".'
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07-03-2009, 00:38
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#3 | |
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Dubious
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Northampton
Posts: 1,571
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Quote:
 
__________________
Look at your signature, now back to mine, now back to yours, now back to mine.
Sadly, yours isn't mine. But if you stopped writing about other things and made this your signature, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. Where are you? You're on Boat Drinks, reading the signature your signature could be like. I'm on a computer. |
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07-03-2009, 00:48
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#4 |
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The Mouse King of Denmark
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: The Winchester
Posts: 6,476
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Haha!
I was in a Chinese restaurant when a duck came up to me with a rose and said: 'Your eyes sparkle like the stars'. So I said to the waiter: 'Excuse me, I ordered aromatic duck.
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07-03-2009, 00:53
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#5 |
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Dubious
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Northampton
Posts: 1,571
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Two crisps walking down the road.. a car pulls up beside them and the driver says:
"Excuse me, do you two want a lift?" The crisps reply, "No thanks, we're Walkers" 
__________________
Look at your signature, now back to mine, now back to yours, now back to mine.
Sadly, yours isn't mine. But if you stopped writing about other things and made this your signature, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. Where are you? You're on Boat Drinks, reading the signature your signature could be like. I'm on a computer. |
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07-03-2009, 01:02
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#6 |
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Dubious
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Northampton
Posts: 1,571
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Why was the washing machine laughing?
Because it was taking the p*** out of the pants
__________________
Look at your signature, now back to mine, now back to yours, now back to mine.
Sadly, yours isn't mine. But if you stopped writing about other things and made this your signature, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. Where are you? You're on Boat Drinks, reading the signature your signature could be like. I'm on a computer. |
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07-03-2009, 01:52
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#7 |
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Absinthe
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,148
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Coventry anyone?
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07-03-2009, 01:53
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#8 | |
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Dubious
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Northampton
Posts: 1,571
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Quote:
__________________
Look at your signature, now back to mine, now back to yours, now back to mine.
Sadly, yours isn't mine. But if you stopped writing about other things and made this your signature, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. Where are you? You're on Boat Drinks, reading the signature your signature could be like. I'm on a computer. |
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08-03-2009, 12:25
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#9 |
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Dubious
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Northampton
Posts: 1,571
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One tectonic plate bumped into another and said.....
"Sorry, my fault."
__________________
Look at your signature, now back to mine, now back to yours, now back to mine.
Sadly, yours isn't mine. But if you stopped writing about other things and made this your signature, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. Where are you? You're on Boat Drinks, reading the signature your signature could be like. I'm on a computer. |
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08-03-2009, 12:37
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#10 |
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Vodka Martini
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Exeter
Posts: 753
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Bravo
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