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30-11-2007, 12:18
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#1 |
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HOMO-Sapien
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Chelmsford
Posts: 6,692
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Classic one liners :D
They say that the classic one liners are dying.
Bob Monkhouse was the king of one liners and one I read in the paper the other day: "When I told them I was a comedian, they all laughed" Another was "Those who believe in telekinesis? Raise MY hand! 
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 I just got lost in thought.. It was very unfamiliar territory. Techie Talk | My gaming Blog | PC spec | The Admirals log |
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30-11-2007, 12:30
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#2 |
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Deep Throat
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 6,512
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It's easy to distract fat people. It's a piece of cake.
My girlfriend said she wanted me to tease her. So I said "Alright then fatty" Jimmy Carr - sheer Genius 
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30-11-2007, 16:57
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#3 | |
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Absinthe
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Leighton Buzzard
Posts: 1,282
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Quote:
Saw him at the Manchester Apollo. He brought the house down. (Not literally!) |
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30-11-2007, 13:06
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#4 |
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The Night Worker
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 5,228
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Rodney Marsh.
Childbirth can't be that painful !!! I mean it can't be no more painful than breaking your leg at football can it !!! *He said it Not me* 
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30-11-2007, 16:41
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#5 |
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Absinthe
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Mostly Oxford, Sometimes Bristol
Posts: 1,156
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Sex always beats logic, but I can't prove it.
I got a new car for my mother-in-law, which was a fine piece of negotiation on my part.
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 Get old, or die tryin' PSTEWREVIEWS - Chunks of Meaty Reviews, Mixed with Your Five a Day of News, Comment and Opinion, Floating in a Broth of Suspect Grammar and Seasoned Liberally with Mixed Metaphor. Tasty. |
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30-11-2007, 18:44
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#6 |
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Moonshine
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Nr Liverpewl
Posts: 4,371
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Patient: "I'm getting a little tired of the sexual innuendo",
The Todd: (thinks deeply for a few seconds) (smiles and nods) "In-your-endo" 
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Thats no hamster, its a space station! |
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30-11-2007, 19:40
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#7 | ||
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Rocket Fuel
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Adrift in the Orca
Posts: 6,845
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Quote:
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 We must move forward not backward, upwards not forward, and always twirling, twirling, twirling... |
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30-11-2007, 20:23
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#8 |
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Wants Big Meat
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Newcastle
Posts: 6,478
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I heard cake
"When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them"
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30-11-2007, 20:36
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#9 |
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Pole Model
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 5,986
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Jeremy Beadle has a huge penis, but on the other hand it's rather small.
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I fell out of favour with Heaven somewhere, and I'm here for the hell of it now... |
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30-11-2007, 21:02
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#10 | |
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Chef extraordinaire
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Infinite Loop
Posts: 11,143
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Quote:
Jeremy Beadle has a small penis but in the other hand it's massive 
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"Dr Sheldon Cooper FTW!" |
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I don't even like cake. 
Hybrid Mode
