Sex In Public.

Von Smallhausen · 05-09-2007, 18:48

The other day I was in the station climbing the EU paperwork mountain when a call came in for me to attend the town centre as a couple had been spotted having sex. Being fortuitous and duty bound, I decided I had to go. The sergeant came with me.

On arrival, I was directed to an alleyway by some smirking members of the public and looked to see a lad sitting down on a wall with a lass striding him and giving it six nowt. The lass looks down the alleyway, sees me and the sergeant and this clearly shocked her as she proceeded to ........ do nothing and continue to bounce.

I walk over and say .... ' I think thats enough, don't you ? ', the lass gets up and off and tries to get dressed but as she is pissed up she struggles. The lad says to me .... can we not have some privacy while she's getting ready, to which I point out that they are not in an enclosed boudoir and are in fact having sex in public which can be frowned upon. He nods a fair enough. I look down at the floor and it is littered with broken glass and for a second I forget that I am a rozzer and on duty ...... I say to the lass while pointing at the glass.

Flowaa, it's lucky you weren't doggy style .... oops.

She just nods agreement and they both have words of advice before scampering off.

Maybe I am just a prude.

Haly · 05-09-2007, 18:52

Dee · 05-09-2007, 18:56

Prude tbh

*stifles laughter*

semi-pro waster · 05-09-2007, 19:02

I'd never thought that being a copper could be so much fun until I heard your stories.

Von Smallhausen · 05-09-2007, 19:06

I should add that the sergeant bit his lip and walked away .... he broke down laughing.

FakeSnake · 05-09-2007, 19:33

question is...
was she cute?

Von Smallhausen · 05-09-2007, 20:08

Quote:

Originally Posted by FakeSnake

question is...
was she cute?

I have no opinion or biased view matey.

( no )

Oh, I almost forgot. I asked the lad if it was his girlfriend and he said .... nah, met her in the pub 20 minutes ago.

Respect !

Daz · 05-09-2007, 20:24

Classy bird that

Admiral Huddy · 06-09-2007, 13:06

Quote:

Originally Posted by Daz

Classy bird that

If she was from Essex, she would have dropped her Chips.. If she was from Suffolk, she would have eaten them at the same time.

I'm quite pruddy about these things.. although I'm a self confessed perv I do believe in a time and place and all that. The odd occassions I have with the Mrs.. I've never felt comfortable with it...

All I say is good job he hadn't have finished otherwise he's have messed your shoes.

Actually, I have to ask, what would noramlly happen to a couple who are having sex in public or a car say? Would they be arrested?

Von Smallhausen · 10-09-2007, 13:22

Quote:

Originally Posted by Admiral Huddy

Actually, I have to ask, what would noramlly happen to a couple who are having sex in public or a car say? Would they be arrested?

If it's in view of the public and in public and quite blase then they would likely be arrested for outraging public decency.

At malc ....... high 5 !

05-09-2007, 18:48	#1
Von Smallhausen I'm Free Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Tyneside Posts: 3,061	Sex In Public. The other day I was in the station climbing the EU paperwork mountain when a call came in for me to attend the town centre as a couple had been spotted having sex. Being fortuitous and duty bound, I decided I had to go. The sergeant came with me. On arrival, I was directed to an alleyway by some smirking members of the public and looked to see a lad sitting down on a wall with a lass striding him and giving it six nowt. The lass looks down the alleyway, sees me and the sergeant and this clearly shocked her as she proceeded to ........ do nothing and continue to bounce. I walk over and say .... ' I think thats enough, don't you ? ', the lass gets up and off and tries to get dressed but as she is pissed up she struggles. The lad says to me .... can we not have some privacy while she's getting ready, to which I point out that they are not in an enclosed boudoir and are in fact having sex in public which can be frowned upon. He nods a fair enough. I look down at the floor and it is littered with broken glass and for a second I forget that I am a rozzer and on duty ...... I say to the lass while pointing at the glass. Flowaa, it's lucky you weren't doggy style .... oops. She just nods agreement and they both have words of advice before scampering off. Maybe I am just a prude. __________________ " Well, old bean, life is really so bloody awful that I feel it’s my absolute duty to be chirpy and try and make everybody else happy too." David Niven, 1910-1983. Last edited by Von Smallhausen; 05-09-2007 at 19:05.

05-09-2007, 18:52	#2
Haly Do you want to hide in my box? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 14,941	__________________ Halycopter

05-09-2007, 19:02	#4
semi-pro waster Provider of sensible advice about homosexuals Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: London Posts: 2,615	I'd never thought that being a copper could be so much fun until I heard your stories. __________________ "Your friend is the man that knows all about you, and still likes you." - Elbert Hubbard

05-09-2007, 19:06	#5
Von Smallhausen I'm Free Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Tyneside Posts: 3,061	I should add that the sergeant bit his lip and walked away .... he broke down laughing. __________________ " Well, old bean, life is really so bloody awful that I feel it’s my absolute duty to be chirpy and try and make everybody else happy too." David Niven, 1910-1983.

05-09-2007, 20:24	#8
Daz The Stig Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Swad! Posts: 10,713	Classy bird that __________________ apt-get moo

05-09-2007, 18:56	#3
Dee Combat Spanker Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 5,292	Prude tbh stifles laughter

05-09-2007, 19:33	#6
FakeSnake Absinthe Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Devonshire Posts: 1,143	question is... was she cute?