Okay, a little warped, but still funny..........

Darrin · 30-10-2007, 01:07

For anyone who has ever had small children or a cat, this is too funny!

A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students. 'Human
beings are the only animals that stutter', she says.

A little girl raises her hand. 'I had a kitty-cat who stuttered', she
volunteered.

The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the little girl to describe the incident.

'Well', she began, 'I was in the back yard with my little kitty cat
and the rottweiler who lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!

'That must've been scary', said the teacher.

'It sure was', said the little girl. 'My kitty went 'Fffff, Fffff, Fffff'...
And before he could say 'F$%*,' the rottweiler ate him!'

Flibster · 30-10-2007, 01:39

Nice doggy... Good doggy...
More kitty-cats for the Doggy to feast upon please.

Will · 30-10-2007, 08:01

Booo with you Flibster!

Treefrog · 30-10-2007, 08:01

Lol Darrin, nice one

Piggymon · 30-10-2007, 08:32

LOL !!!

Matblack · 30-10-2007, 10:55

Our bloody cat gave me a scare last night, last year he had a blocked bladder last year which almost resulted in him dying from toxic shock, he was basically dying in my arms when I took him to the vet.

The symptoms were him hiding (cats often take themselves off to be alone when they feel they are going to die) and being off his food.

Last night I came home and he didn't come for his food, this is very unusual as he's a gready sod like his dad. I eventually dug him out from under the bed but he was very slow and reluctant to come down stairs, when he did he wouldn't touch his food. So after a bit of monitoring I decided it would be best to take him to the vet.

Vet looks at him and says he is a bit off colour but theres nothing wrong with him, give him antibios and anti inflams and send me home to come back the next day or in the night if he gets bad.

I get him home, he comes out of his box and woofs down a pack and a half of food and promptly asks for more, little sod.

Cost me £35 too, but I prefer to know he is alright especially after the last time.

MB

Will · 30-10-2007, 12:16

Our cat decided to sit next to pot of water on the hob - it managed to singe it's tail in the fire - stupid thing didn't realise and didn't understand why I whisked her off the workbench and patted her down so vigorously - she enjoyed it though.

30-10-2007, 01:07	#1
Darrin Dirteh Kitteh Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Hiding out in Mormon Country Posts: 1,629	Okay, a little warped, but still funny.......... For anyone who has ever had small children or a cat, this is too funny! A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students. 'Human beings are the only animals that stutter', she says. A little girl raises her hand. 'I had a kitty-cat who stuttered', she volunteered. The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the little girl to describe the incident. 'Well', she began, 'I was in the back yard with my little kitty cat and the rottweiler who lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard! 'That must've been scary', said the teacher. 'It sure was', said the little girl. 'My kitty went 'Fffff, Fffff, Fffff'... And before he could say 'F$%*,' the rottweiler ate him!' __________________ A bullet may have your name on it, but shrapnel is addressed "to whom it may concern".

30-10-2007, 01:39	#2
Flibster Moonshine Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 3,388	Nice doggy... Good doggy... More kitty-cats for the Doggy to feast upon please. __________________

30-10-2007, 08:01	#3
Will BBx woz 'ere :P Join Date: Jan 1970 Posts: 2,147,487,208	Booo with you Flibster! __________________ *No No!*

30-10-2007, 08:01	#4
Treefrog Survivor Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Chell Heath, Stoke-on-Trent Posts: 1,761	Lol Darrin, nice one __________________ Commit random kindness and senseless acts of beauty

30-10-2007, 08:32	#5
Piggymon Lara Croft Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: PigmoPad - Braintree Essex Posts: 8,604	LOL !!! __________________ BF% 28/08/08 - 21%

30-10-2007, 10:55	#6
Matblack Baby Bore Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Svalbard Posts: 9,770	Our bloody cat gave me a scare last night, last year he had a blocked bladder last year which almost resulted in him dying from toxic shock, he was basically dying in my arms when I took him to the vet. The symptoms were him hiding (cats often take themselves off to be alone when they feel they are going to die) and being off his food. Last night I came home and he didn't come for his food, this is very unusual as he's a gready sod like his dad. I eventually dug him out from under the bed but he was very slow and reluctant to come down stairs, when he did he wouldn't touch his food. So after a bit of monitoring I decided it would be best to take him to the vet. Vet looks at him and says he is a bit off colour but theres nothing wrong with him, give him antibios and anti inflams and send me home to come back the next day or in the night if he gets bad. I get him home, he comes out of his box and woofs down a pack and a half of food and promptly asks for more, little sod. Cost me £35 too, but I prefer to know he is alright especially after the last time. MB __________________ "we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two"

30-10-2007, 12:16	#7
Will BBx woz 'ere :P Join Date: Jan 1970 Posts: 2,147,487,208	Our cat decided to sit next to pot of water on the hob - it managed to singe it's tail in the fire - stupid thing didn't realise and didn't understand why I whisked her off the workbench and patted her down so vigorously - she enjoyed it though. __________________ *No No!*