Ebay scammer

[Daz]

I'm selling something on ebay atm, have had a few offers via email as you do, seemingly legit. Had a couple of emails today that seem a bit fishy...

I am a uk national and am wanting to bids for your item, I have been stinging before on ebay from alaeged IT professhinals would you be selling to me before auction finish.. please give me a price in Ugandan dollars. current exchange rate 6.36 UD = 1 UK pound..

Followed by...

I am in much keeness for you to make me a price for your item for sales. As your auckshun is ending soon and with exchange rates changing by the minute, NASDAQ spiking, FTSE climbing and the Dow melting the hearts of forex traders across the western world, margins are tight, anticipation is high, time is pressing and the day will soon be gone... to that end and with fervent wishes to expedite this transaction with more slickness than even a lubers crotch please tell me of your wanting prices for your item. I would be hating for you to be "shunted from your backside" as it were and you lose on the splendid Ugandan (& indeed Zimbabwian) exchange rates?
reply to me in pleasing as you can fastly place me out of this betting if you not selling...
thanks you many
antonia

Apparently he's from Warwickshire. I'd better hurry, I'd hate to be shunted from my backside.