Boat Drinks Top Tips

[SidewinderINC]

Originally Posted by Justsomebloke

I have heard of this before.
Sounds like she needs a proffesional Muff diver like myself to pay a visit, Poor girl.

LOL, you make out like it's my fault! I've never been allowed

[Justsomebloke]

It's not your Fault mate, well at least I hope it isn't. Something has put her off though, Prob a previous Idiot boyf with innapropriate comments.





Edit.
How the Hell did we get on this topic.

[Flibster]

Always let your drunk lesbian neighbour girls come round to play Wii fit.

[Pumpkinstew]

Those yellow things that sometimes get put in urinals, well, they only look like ice pops when they actually aren't.

[SidewinderINC]

Never accidentally pull the "disabled emergency cord" thinking that it's the lightswitch, and then when the light doesn't turn on, don't keep pulling it.

[Mark]

When in a hotel room in a compromising situation, always use the security chain. You never know when housekeeping are going to turn up.

[Justsomebloke]

When a woman says No she means No.
When a woman says Ok she means No.
When a women says Yes she means Only when I am ****** ready !!!

[Goose]

When arriving at a hotel, hang your shirts up in the bathroom and crank the shower up to max heat. Leave for a bit, then let the bathroom air. Your shirts will (hopefully) no longer have terrible creases.

Always make sure everything is away before zipping up, gents.

Oh, and don't pick up the soap.

[Mark]

Or, as an alternative, roll the clothes up instead of folding them. There's less chance of them ending up a mangled mess in the suitcase that way.

[Pheebs]

Originally Posted by Knipples

To remove red wine from a carpet, throw white wine on it.

Originally Posted by iCraig

To remove white wine from a carpet, throw rosé on it.

You guys both forgot the "and then suck the said spot until clean!"

Waste not want not!

Originally Posted by Kitten

Oh... and always make sure that the lamp is between you and the window (not behind you) when masturbating with the curtains closed.

Do you know my neighbour over the road?!



A seriousish one from me - if you're ever feeling pants take some time in the evening or late at night to just go look at the stars by yourself. Nice, slow and deep breaths and look at them stars and remember in your mind you're an absolute miracle to be who and where you are right now, with the ability to think and reason and well. Yeh. You only live once and you're living it right now and nothing else matters. You're lucky and amazing and albeit you could view yourself as potentially an insignificant blimp in the whole universe when looking at such a vast sky, you're unique. There's nothing out there like you... which makes you just as special, if not more special than the awesome sight before you

It's brilliant