Poo :(

[Feek]

I've not been able to do a poo for two days.

That is all.

[Justsomebloke]

Mix yourself a fresh salad made from the finest ingredients.
Smother it in Olive oil & I mean Smother it.
Eat, Num num num num num.
Wait all the while knowing shortly you will be ****ting for England.
JD.

[Jonny69]

Ah my kinda thread

Hope you're keeping an eye on movements though Feekles

Prunes, dried apricots, raisins, good strong coffee, muesli, bran etc. Think brown

[Pheebs]

BRanflakes FTW!

[divine]

Drink a couple of litres of orange juice (not squash). You won't be able to hold it in.

I know this because last year during some hot weather I decided lots of OJ was a good way to keep my hydration up. Which it was, until it all came out the arse end very shortly after.

[iCraig]

Couple of bowls of branflakes, an apple and a strong black coffee.

You'll soon be launching a brown submarine.

[Flibster]

Or - go to Heathrow and get someone to phone in saying you're trying to smuggle drugs.

They'll soon have someone there with a rubber glove and a spoon to 'search'

[Desmo]

12 Weetabix set me off once. Wasn't a pretty sight

[Lana]

Get some carrots and celery and eat them raw with hummous. Raw veggies are great for fiber content.
And prune juice works very well, apparantly they use it in hospitals for extreme cases.

[iCraig]

Or find some mints/chewing gum that use sorbitol as a sweetener. Snaffle as many as you can and it'll be like shoes falling out of a loft hatch.