Gears of War Multiplayer ** Fridays/Saturdays around 8pm ** - Page 22

Belmit · 24-01-2007, 11:05

Bored at work. Wrote something.

Developer 1: 'OK, this boss. I think it's taken for granted that he should be harder than a Soviet hammer soaked in vinegar.'
Developer 2: 'Agreed. But I don't think that's enough.'
D1: 'You're right. We need to think outside the box on this one. What would be quite annoying for the player at this point in the game?'
D2: [Strokes goatee] 'Hmm, what's been the single most frustrating and pointless part of the game up to this point?'
D1: [Snaps fingers and points] 'Krill!'
D2: 'Genius. He can have a gun that fires Krill!'
D1: 'No, no, no. They'd expect that. How about, and run with me on this... a shield made entirely of Krill that he can send out to annihilate you if you so much as look at a shadow?'
D2: 'Love it. And just to make sure, let's make the dark areas only a shade darker than the light ones.'
D2: [Jumps up]'Yes! And even if you're standing in the light you can still be winged by them!'
D1: [Grins] 'Now we're talking.'
D2: [Wringing hands together like a junky] 'OK, OK, that's quite annoying, but I still think we need to give this guy an edge.
D1: 'Well he has a shield but no weapon...'
D2: 'One word. Chaingun.'
D1: 'Isn't that two words?'
D2: 'It's a 'portmanteau'; taking two or more words or parts of words and splicing them together to give a combined meaning.'
D1: 'Are you sure? I would have thought that a 'compound' was a more appropriate description. Like with 'bagpipes' or 'corkscrew'...'
D2: 'You may well be right. Anyway, I think we need to make this gun particularly devestating.'
D1: '...tablecloth...'
D2: 'Let's make this gun ten times more powerful than any other ballistic weapon we've seen in the game so far.'
D1: 'Great idea. I'm starting to like the difficulty curve we've got going on here.'
D2: 'You mean a plateau followed by a wall?'
D1: 'Precisely.'
D2: 'OK, Maybe we should tip the balance back the other way a little, give the player some hope?'
D1: [Wary] 'O...K... Well they already have a friendly bot to draw fire, surely that's enough?'
D2: 'Yeah, I forgot that. How are the programming team coming on with the A.I.?'
D1: 'It's done. They found an old five-and-three-quarter-inch disk with exactly the code on they were looking for.'
D2: 'Amazing, what are the chances? Presumably they've adapted it from an older game then?'
D1: 'Yes, Lemmings.'
D2: 'Good stuff. So basically the A.I. player...'
D1: 'Runs at the invincible, hard-as-nails, WMD-toting, bat-shielded psychopath firing indiscriminately? Yes.'
D2: 'What about staying in the light to avoid being torn apart?'
D1: 'Disregards it.'
D2: [Nods] 'Nice touch.'
D1: 'To be fair, we have included a shielded gun turret.'
D2: 'I don't like the sound of that. It shields the player from Krill as well?'
D1: 'Haha! Don't be daft!'
D2: 'But still, isn't that a massive advantage?'
D1: 'It's in the dark.'
D2: 'Oooooh momma! They won't like that!'
D1: 'Indeed. That's presuming the bot stays alive long enough to draw fire and allow you to get to it.'
D2: 'Of course.'

[Three hours later]

D2: '...and the gunships can fly around the train taking potshots at you, chipping away at your health so you have to stay in cover longer, allowing the boss guy to get closer to you.'
D1: 'That's another compound.'
D2: 'What is?'
D1: 'Potshots.'
D2: 'Oh yeah. 'Firefight' is another.'
D1: '...deathwish...'
D2: '...dickheads...'
[They high-five]

THE END

Daz · 24-01-2007, 11:11

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHhahHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Davey_Pitch · 24-01-2007, 11:51

Pure genius Belmit!

Haly · 24-01-2007, 12:24

You're making me dread that part now

leowyatt · 24-01-2007, 12:26

Most excellent Belmit

An ace read.

Don't worry Jen if you need a hand, give either of us a shout

Haly · 24-01-2007, 12:28

Thanks

I'll get round to playing more of GoW soon, it's in my pile to do

Belmit · 25-01-2007, 00:00

Finally completed it shortly after I got in from work. Bit disappointed that that was the end though, was expecting another half a game! I was under the impression that you got to fight one of those massive war machines at some point. I guess that's for another game though...

Davey_Pitch · 25-01-2007, 01:40

I'm fairly certain there will be another game. There is so much story left untouched and unexplained that there simply has to be another game. Also, they'll have the graphical engine down perfectly (it's already superb, no real need to alter it except a few tweaks I would imagine), so it's probably just creating a whole new story, levels, and maybe some new gameplay mechanics. Some new AI for Dom would be nice as well, get rid of that Lemming AI

Belmit · 25-01-2007, 09:59

Yeah, they really need to sort the AI out. I'm now going through on the hardcore setting and I'm at the bit where you find the dead COG soldiers by the giant hole in the ground, followed immediately by a sentry gun that you have to flank. I did so, and started shooting the guy manning it but he turned the gun towards me (as you'd expect). I thought maybe the three other guys would draw his fire away again, but when I went back to find them they were all crouched behind a wall! Six times I had to run back and forth to get the enemy's attention so I could sneak up and get a couple of shots in. And this is before the point where you can give orders. Gah!

Davey_Pitch · 25-01-2007, 10:05

I think I just crept up behind the Troika dude and just chainsawed him in half. Saves screwing around and getting shot at

24-01-2007, 11:05	#211
Belmit The Mouse King of Denmark Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: The Winchester Posts: 6,476	Bored at work. Wrote something. Developer 1: 'OK, this boss. I think it's taken for granted that he should be harder than a Soviet hammer soaked in vinegar.' Developer 2: 'Agreed. But I don't think that's enough.' D1: 'You're right. We need to think outside the box on this one. What would be quite annoying for the player at this point in the game?' D2: [Strokes goatee] 'Hmm, what's been the single most frustrating and pointless part of the game up to this point?' D1: [Snaps fingers and points] 'Krill!' D2: 'Genius. He can have a gun that fires Krill!' D1: 'No, no, no. They'd expect that. How about, and run with me on this... a shield made entirely of Krill that he can send out to annihilate you if you so much as look at a shadow?' D2: 'Love it. And just to make sure, let's make the dark areas only a shade darker than the light ones.' D2: [Jumps up]'Yes! And even if you're standing in the light you can still be winged by them!' D1: [Grins] 'Now we're talking.' D2: [Wringing hands together like a junky] 'OK, OK, that's quite annoying, but I still think we need to give this guy an edge. D1: 'Well he has a shield but no weapon...' D2: 'One word. Chaingun.' D1: 'Isn't that two words?' D2: 'It's a 'portmanteau'; taking two or more words or parts of words and splicing them together to give a combined meaning.' D1: 'Are you sure? I would have thought that a 'compound' was a more appropriate description. Like with 'bagpipes' or 'corkscrew'...' D2: 'You may well be right. Anyway, I think we need to make this gun particularly devestating.' D1: '...tablecloth...' D2: 'Let's make this gun ten times more powerful than any other ballistic weapon we've seen in the game so far.' D1: 'Great idea. I'm starting to like the difficulty curve we've got going on here.' D2: 'You mean a plateau followed by a wall?' D1: 'Precisely.' D2: 'OK, Maybe we should tip the balance back the other way a little, give the player some hope?' D1: [Wary] 'O...K... Well they already have a friendly bot to draw fire, surely that's enough?' D2: 'Yeah, I forgot that. How are the programming team coming on with the A.I.?' D1: 'It's done. They found an old five-and-three-quarter-inch disk with exactly the code on they were looking for.' D2: 'Amazing, what are the chances? Presumably they've adapted it from an older game then?' D1: 'Yes, Lemmings.' D2: 'Good stuff. So basically the A.I. player...' D1: 'Runs at the invincible, hard-as-nails, WMD-toting, bat-shielded psychopath firing indiscriminately? Yes.' D2: 'What about staying in the light to avoid being torn apart?' D1: 'Disregards it.' D2: [Nods] 'Nice touch.' D1: 'To be fair, we have included a shielded gun turret.' D2: 'I don't like the sound of that. It shields the player from Krill as well?' D1: 'Haha! Don't be daft!' D2: 'But still, isn't that a massive advantage?' D1: 'It's in the dark.' D2: 'Oooooh momma! They won't like that!' D1: 'Indeed. That's presuming the bot stays alive long enough to draw fire and allow you to get to it.' D2: 'Of course.' [Three hours later] D2: '...and the gunships can fly around the train taking potshots at you, chipping away at your health so you have to stay in cover longer, allowing the boss guy to get closer to you.' D1: 'That's another compound.' D2: 'What is?' D1: 'Potshots.' D2: 'Oh yeah. 'Firefight' is another.' D1: '...deathwish...' D2: '...dickheads...' [They high-five] THE END __________________ Last edited by Belmit; 24-01-2007 at 12:04.

24-01-2007, 11:11	#212
Daz The Stig Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Swad! Posts: 10,713	HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHhahHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA __________________ apt-get moo

24-01-2007, 11:51	#213
Davey_Pitch I iz speshul Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Liverpool Posts: 6,296	Pure genius Belmit! __________________ Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

24-01-2007, 12:24	#214
Haly Do you want to hide in my box? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 14,941	You're making me dread that part now __________________ Halycopter

24-01-2007, 12:26	#215
leowyatt Chef extraordinaire Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Infinite Loop Posts: 11,143	Most excellent Belmit An ace read. Don't worry Jen if you need a hand, give either of us a shout __________________ "Dr Sheldon Cooper FTW!"

24-01-2007, 12:28	#216
Haly Do you want to hide in my box? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 14,941	Thanks I'll get round to playing more of GoW soon, it's in my pile to do __________________ Halycopter

25-01-2007, 00:00	#217
Belmit The Mouse King of Denmark Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: The Winchester Posts: 6,476	Finally completed it shortly after I got in from work. Bit disappointed that that was the end though, was expecting another half a game! I was under the impression that you got to fight one of those massive war machines at some point. I guess that's for another game though... __________________

25-01-2007, 01:40	#218
Davey_Pitch I iz speshul Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Liverpool Posts: 6,296	I'm fairly certain there will be another game. There is so much story left untouched and unexplained that there simply has to be another game. Also, they'll have the graphical engine down perfectly (it's already superb, no real need to alter it except a few tweaks I would imagine), so it's probably just creating a whole new story, levels, and maybe some new gameplay mechanics. Some new AI for Dom would be nice as well, get rid of that Lemming AI __________________ Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

25-01-2007, 09:59	#219
Belmit The Mouse King of Denmark Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: The Winchester Posts: 6,476	Yeah, they really need to sort the AI out. I'm now going through on the hardcore setting and I'm at the bit where you find the dead COG soldiers by the giant hole in the ground, followed immediately by a sentry gun that you have to flank. I did so, and started shooting the guy manning it but he turned the gun towards me (as you'd expect). I thought maybe the three other guys would draw his fire away again, but when I went back to find them they were all crouched behind a wall! Six times I had to run back and forth to get the enemy's attention so I could sneak up and get a couple of shots in. And this is before the point where you can give orders. Gah! __________________

25-01-2007, 10:05	#220
Davey_Pitch I iz speshul Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Liverpool Posts: 6,296	I think I just crept up behind the Troika dude and just chainsawed him in half. Saves screwing around and getting shot at __________________ Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.