The Jokes thread! - Page 3

Blighter · 17-09-2008, 16:35

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fayshun

A blonde walks into a bank in London and asks to see the manager

She says she's going to Hong Kong on business for two weeks and needs to borrow £5,000.

The manager says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan, so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Ferrari.

The car is parked on the street in front of the bank, she has the title and everything checks out.

The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan.

The manager and the tellers all enjoy a good laugh at the blonde for using a £200,000 Ferrari as collateral against a £5,000 loan.

An employee of the bank then proceeds to drive the Ferrari into the bank's underground garage and parks it there.

Two weeks later, the blonde returns, repays the £5,000 and the interest, which comes to £17.41.

The manager says, 'Miss, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled.

While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a millionairess.

What puzzles us is why would you bother to borrow £5,000?'

The blonde replies...'Where else in central London can I park my car for two weeks for only £17.41 and expect it to be there when I return?'

That shouldn't be a blonde joke

Garp · 17-09-2008, 16:37

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blighter

That shouldn't be a blonde joke

That's half the joke...

Garp · 19-09-2008, 17:29

What's the difference between a ~~Porsche~~ Ferrari and a hedgehog?

A hedgehog has its pricks on the outside.

Garp · 30-09-2008, 09:56

Said the Buddhist to the hot dog vendor: "Make me one with everything."

Garp · 09-10-2008, 12:25

A farmer had 3 beautiful daughters who were getting ready to go out on dates. The first beau came to the door and said, ''''I''m Eddie, I''m here to pick up Betty. We''re going for spaghetti, is she ready?''''

"No," the farmer said.

The second beau came to the door and said, ''''I''m Joe, I''m here to pick up Flo to take her to the show. Is she ready to go?''''

"No."

The third beau came to the door and said to the farmer. ''''Hello, my name is Chuck.''''

The farmer shot Chuck.

NokkonWud · 09-10-2008, 13:35

lol!

.

Garp · 13-10-2008, 08:43

A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing "Love" stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. His curiosity gets the better of him and he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he's doing.
"I'm sending out 1,000 Valentine's Day cards signed, 'Guess who?'"
"But why?" asks the man.
"I'm a divorce lawyer."

19-09-2008, 17:29	#23
Garp Preparing more tumbleweed Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Hawaii Posts: 6,038	What's the difference between a ~~Porsche~~ Ferrari and a hedgehog? A hedgehog has its pricks on the outside. __________________ Mal: Define "interesting"? Wash: "Oh, God, oh, God, we're all gonna die"? Last edited by Garp; 21-09-2008 at 16:53.

30-09-2008, 09:56	#24
Garp Preparing more tumbleweed Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Hawaii Posts: 6,038	Said the Buddhist to the hot dog vendor: "Make me one with everything." __________________ Mal: Define "interesting"? Wash: "Oh, God, oh, God, we're all gonna die"?

09-10-2008, 12:25	#25
Garp Preparing more tumbleweed Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Hawaii Posts: 6,038	A farmer had 3 beautiful daughters who were getting ready to go out on dates. The first beau came to the door and said, ''''I''m Eddie, I''m here to pick up Betty. We''re going for spaghetti, is she ready?'''' "No," the farmer said. The second beau came to the door and said, ''''I''m Joe, I''m here to pick up Flo to take her to the show. Is she ready to go?'''' "No." The third beau came to the door and said to the farmer. ''''Hello, my name is Chuck.'''' The farmer shot Chuck. __________________ Mal: Define "interesting"? Wash: "Oh, God, oh, God, we're all gonna die"?

09-10-2008, 13:35	#26
NokkonWud BD Recruitment Officer Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Smogville Posts: 3,880	lol! . __________________

13-10-2008, 08:43	#27
Garp Preparing more tumbleweed Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Hawaii Posts: 6,038	A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing "Love" stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. His curiosity gets the better of him and he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he's doing. "I'm sending out 1,000 Valentine's Day cards signed, 'Guess who?'" "But why?" asks the man. "I'm a divorce lawyer." __________________ Mal: Define "interesting"? Wash: "Oh, God, oh, God, we're all gonna die"?